Starting to freak out just a little

[xela]

I'm due at Mass Eye & Ear in 12 hours, and I'm starting to freak out just a little bit.

The thought just crossed my mind that (save a dozen I read slowly the other day in a terminal window that took up my entire 23-inch cinema display) every single word I have ever read in my entire life; every sight I've ever clearly seen — every rainbow, every falling star; every snowflake, every budding flower; every dragonfly and every interesting pebble and most of all every smile whose memory makes me smile — all of these entered my brain by way of this matrix of transparent cells. Which tomorrow someone I barely know will unceremoniously vibrate into jelly, vacuum out, and replace with a piece of plastic.

Comments

[sammason.livejournal.com]

I'd find it frightening too. This isn't something you'd choose to get involved with, not at all.

But you're going into a very good hospital to have a routine operation under the care of very good doctors and nurses. When they've done their work your eyesight will be far better than it is now, maybe better than it's ever been.

The particular cells that will be replaced are just cells. They're not even a permanent part of you because like all cells, they've been apoptosing and replacing themselves all your life. In contrast your joyful memories of beauty and interest are yours to keep. With your improved eye you'll be ready to see a lot more beauty and interest and that will be yours to keep too.

[hlinspjalda.livejournal.com]

*hug* Our bodies are miraculous things. Our ability to repair them is miraculous too. I'm glad you live in a time and place where you can be the recipient of this miracle. But I understand the trepidation too.

[gigglefest.livejournal.com]

I think freaking out a little bit is reasonable. I'll try to breathe deeply on your behalf.